The Naughty Nine
- cosy
- kinetic
- gentle
- redemptive
- tender
- funny
Cosy, breathless, gentle family / adventure, grounded in texture. Redemptive, mid-stakes, tender, hand-scored across twelve axes of taste.
How every film is hand-scored →Fifth-grader Andy finds himself without a present from Santa on Christmas morning. Realizing he must have landed on the “naughty list” and feeling unfairly maligned, Andy pulls together a team of eight other naughty-listers to help him execute an elaborate heist on Santa’s Village at the North Pole to get the presents they feel they deserve.
Our read · The Naughty Nine (2023) reads as a cosy, breathless, grounded family · adventure · comedy entry — gentle in intensity, mid-stakes in scope, tender in temperature, redemptive in outlook. Hand-scored on twelve axes of taste — mood, pacing, weirdness, hope, stakes, humour, reality, density, warmth, auteur, intensity, and era — with a derived palette drawn from its dominant cinematography.
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The shape of The Naughty Nine
The reading.
Each axis is hand-scored — not derived from votes or genre averages. The marker shows where this film sits; the gradient fill uses the film's own cinematography palette.
Eight films that read most like this one.
Geometric closeness in the twelve-axis space — pure DNA distance, not “people also liked.” Distance numbers are listed under each title for sceners who like to know the maths.
Discussion
What does your Movie DNA look like?
Rate a few films you've seen. We map your taste across the same twelve axes and find the films you'll actually want to watch tonight.
Calibrate yourself